The AB3s of Speaking without Ideas

February 20th, 2025

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You attended 15, possibly up to 25, meetings last week. Many were useful. A few delivered valuable information. A handful you endured with no relevance to you whatsoever. And at least two were premised on ideas that were just flat-out wrong. But through all of it, your colleagues never heard your voice. Not one time.

Meeting after meeting, others jumped-in to offer ideas, ask questions, raise flags. Even when your manager gave you an opening, you let it pass. In performance reviews, you continue to hear versions of, "We wish you had a larger presence on the team." It’s code for: We believe you’re capable of more, but we don’t experience it.

Here’s the hard truth: Fair or not, consistent lack of contribution to discussions sends a message about your commitment and even your value. In many cases, left unchecked, this behavior becomes a career-limiting pattern, and introverts don't get a pass for eternity.

In my experience consulting with leaders dedicated to the quality of their team culture, when there is resistance to collaboration, one reliable assumption is a breakdown of psychological safety throughout the organization. In those cases, people don’t speak-up because the risks outweigh the rewards. No one wants to be embarrassed, contradicted, or dismissed. So everyone adjusts their behaviors to play it safe.

Even more destructive than silence, the epidemic of tacit agreement—silently nodding along even when you know something is off. These acts of self-preservation erode trust, stifle innovation, and kill momentum. 

Nurturing a culture where ideas are rigorously debated openly, across levels and roles, is the long-term remedy. But here’s another potentially fair diagnosis: sometimes the silence isn’t systemic. Sometimes, it’s you.

Even on healthy, high-performing teams, some top talent shrinks back, waiting for the perfect idea to arrive and the perfect moment to step forward. Waiting. But eventually, the invitations stop coming. You stop getting looped into key discussions. And the cycle reinforces itself.

If you believe, "I should only speak when I have a breakthrough insight," you risk severely limiting possibilities for expanded influence and collaboration. If you want to grow your impact, stop waiting for a lightning bolt. There are plenty of meaningful ways to contribute before the next brilliant idea materializes.

Here are the AB3s of asserting your voice in meetings while you wait for those game-changing inspirations to arrive: 

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Underline Value. AI can already impressively summarize information and list action items addressed in a meeting. Leave that to the bots. What it can’t do is tell the room what mattered to you. It can’t speak from your experience, your judgment, or your gut.

That's why you are there.

If someone's comment hits—say so. If an idea is strong—endorse it. If a data point deserves weight—underline it. Give shape to the conversation by emphasizing what deserves traction. You don’t need to have the breakthrough idea every time. But you do need to show people what you value. 

The "first-follower" often wields just as much influence as the one who originated the idea, a powerful leadership move in converting thought into movement. Bonus: When done sincerely, backing a colleague is one of the fastest ways to build trust across the team.

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Connect Dots. Let's face it, winning an argument feels very satisfying. But in the desire to dominate intellectually, even the smartest, most well-meaning colleagues can lose sight of how much common ground actually exists. When tensions rise, it's easy for multiple perspectives to seem farther apart than they are. 

It can sound like Sales is pushing for faster deal closures while Legal is pumping the brakes to mitigate long-term exposure. Or that R&D and Marketing are working from totally different data sets, when in reality, they’re asking different questions of the same consumers. A recent hire and a "legacy" employee might both hope a project will succeed, yet approach the rollout strategy from opposite ends of the process. In each case, both parties have valid perspectives.

Seize this opportunity to lower the temperature. Rather than accentuating the distance, identify the areas where multiple perspectives relate. Say it out loud. Bridging ideas across function, geography, and level is a strategic and appreciated way to keep meetings productive. Connecting those dots raises the game for everyone on the team.

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Expand Possibilities –  When someone introduces a new thought, it's possible they are successfully solving one problem but not yet realizing the rippled applications throughout the organization. Beyond underlying the foundational value or connecting various parts together, you can go a step further and build upwards from there. 

The hallmark of improvisational theater isn't just "yes, and…", it's actually, "yes, and also…" A stimulus is offered by the audience or performers and everyone on stage accepts it unconditionally. Then they dive forward with additional ideas that extend the original, often to hysterical effect. 

Engineers know this rhythm well. They don't attempt to build a perfect product in one shot—they prototype. They sketch a rough version, build it quickly, test it thoroughly, tweak it, and build it again. Each iteration adds to the original idea. Throughout the process, the initial version becomes a platform for broader possibilities.

So if you find yourself nodding along when an idea is initially raised, don't stop there. Ask, "What else?" While many of your colleagues will reflexively point out the inherent challenges, you can choose to spotlight the hidden benefits. Amplify the richer possibilities and expanded value that you see in building beyond the original idea.

Like anything, you can over-rotate on these strategies and produce a range of equally unwanted behaviors (the "phoney-agreer", the "unnecessary-summerizer", etc.). Beware that these strategies are used with a heavy dose of authenticity. 

Also, if you're someone who tends to dominate by "over-talking" in meetings, finding opportunities to defer to the team is an appreciated act of leadership too. That kind of self-awareness—deferring to others, making space—is deeply valuable. But for many professionals, that balance needs recalibration: the team deserves to hear more of your thinking.

AB3+: Collaborative Mindset. Deciding to share your voice in one of these three ways will significantly shift the way you listen to your colleagues. You are now in a true collaborative partnership, thinking more deeply, prioritizing the digestion of others' ideas versus waiting to "top" their wisdom with your own intellectual offerings. 

And yes… when the next big idea is yours, speak up. That will feel great, but don’t wait until it is.

Connect with Ari

Inspirations for this blog stem from real experiences with clients, thoughtful discussions with colleagues, and the in-depth research and readings publicly available on communication, leadership, and influence. If you're looking to explore the ideas behind The AB3s of Speaking without Ideas more deeply, here’s a list of insightful resources that have primarily informed this work:

• Crucial Conversations by Joseph Grenny, Kerry Patterson, Ron McMillan, Al Switzler, and Emily Gregory - 2002

• Mindset by Carol Dweck – 2006

• How to Start a Movement TED Talk by Derek Sivers -- 2016

• What Google Learned from its Quest to Build the Perfect Team in New York Times Magazine-- 2016

• Talk by Alison Wood Brooks – 2025

These offer frameworks, case studies, and expert insights that pair with The AB3 Group's philosophy—and may spark your next level of growth. Let's talk!